While I am NO Carrie Bradshaw and am the least bit interested in putting my love life, or lack there of, on display... I had to laugh tonight and share this sweet story:
I have been acquaintace ¨friends¨ with a guy in town for probably four or five months. This means we say hi, do the mandatory cheek kiss in passing and we ask one another about the other`s family. On Valentine`s Day we saw each other in passing and upon seeing me with a rose asked about my ¨boyfriend,¨ who I said was good. I explained though that the rose I had bought for Benicia and was looking for chocolates. He joked and said there is no chocolate here in Orocuina and that he`d bring some by the next day. He never stopped by, and I assumed all was well. Cheque! I, however, learned an important lesson about ¨Catracho communication¨ tonight when this ¨friend¨ showed up at the door with a rose and package of chocolates. Thank goodness he was too shy to come in and said he would stop by some day to talk. Super sweet, but super nooot good considering I just want to be friends and this friend thinks I have a boyfriend!!! (**This is funny in that I am sooo no streetwise; however, I am chalking it up to still being a fairly new single... **)
In the spirit of international amor, I thought I`d share some fun tips I seem to be picking up along the way:
- Open communication and Respect are KEY (while this is true for any relationship, it is all the more important when exploring and navigating different cultures and belief systems.)
- Humor is maybe even more important! Chances are, one or both of you are going to say something completely inappropriate, possibly in an even more inappropriate setting, and you need to be able to laugh at your self and each other... really, otherwise why are you together?
- Curiosity. Having the chance to learn about other cultures and parts of the world from someone you care about rocks! So take it all in!
- Did I mention the importance of open communication?
That being said... when it comes to politely declining relationships here in Honduras, my sound, humble piece of advise is: LIE!
While my foreign friends and I have repeatedly told guys in our towns that we are not interested in dating (and even have gone as far as to lie and make up a boyfriend), without the physical presence of a man by our sides, our fictious Don Juans don`t amount to much. While I know that many, many Honduran males have another if not multiple partners beyond their ¨main squeeze,¨ I am suprised to find out that men expect some women... ie. THIS woman to have another as well. I was informed tonight that ¨In order to be left alone, Amandita, you need to invent a husband. A novio, boyfriend, will not do, you must have a husband, with a ring.... even then a picture or recording of him professing his love would help!¨ (Says the oh so wise Benicia)
Well Benicia is probably right, it is a bit late in the game to be making up husbands... so for now I better work on my communication!! (and perhaps appreciate the chocolate :) )
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